This is a story, a story about me, the shy kid in class or the kinda kid that you see on regular bases sad or hopeless.
I was never known as the cool kid, I never liked being around people, there was nothing special about me, not at the time at least. But back then I didn't realize this all was gonna change and I will be a different person.
It all started in the 7th grade, the good years of Hormones and emotions. I was bullied for being different, different from all the other kids who were social and had a voice. it's not like I'm mute, it's just that I wished I was back then, So I would at least have an excuse for not talking or socializing with people.
My story starts with a girl, and as a teenager I thought back then that I've found love, just by looking at her my heart starts racing, and my head starts forcing my eyes to look down in order to avoid eye contact which I thought will cause her to make fun of me and in order will cause the other kids to bully me more, I couldn't let this happen, I was avoiding being around her in school and out of school. one day mt mom signed me up for a trip with the church, - yeah I was a christian back then, I'm an agnostic now, but that's a story for another day- and I had to go because my mom was always on my back about staying in my room all day and never going out, you know moms when they do something even if it may seem stupid and pisses you off it's probably for your own good, anyway I had to go and I could't act myself out of the situation which sometimes worked to stay home, in my safe zone. I thought that my mom stabbed me in the back at the time because I genuinely didn't want to go, but the second I got on that bus and saw her sitting there talking to her friends my heart flew out of my body and I was pluralized for a couple of seconds and thought that this might be my chance, but it wasn't, she was always either with her friends or just working with the stuff that we went to do with the church. and as always I went home, got to my room and played some Eminem, he gave me strength when I needed him, he's my idol and my hero, I wished to be like him, because he seems so confidant and so comfortable with who he is, unlike me who thought that I will never have a reason to live for. so days go by I don't see that girl anywhere. not in school and not in church, something's wrong I think but I didn't overthink it because she didn't even know I existed at the time. but then one day she comes to school, and she stands right next to me in the cafeteria, "This is my chance and I can't blow it" I think to myself then turn and look at her, you know when you speak but no words come out, that's how it was just a bunch of hey's and spit, I didn't know what to say, I froze, but I remembered something I heard on "We bought a Zoo" that all I needed is to count to 3 and then act, all I needed is 5 seconds of not being me, and I worked, I actually formed a sentience and actually said it to her, she said "hey" and that was one of the best hey's I have ever heard, I melted for a second and looked away as if it was just a friendly "hey" but deep down inside I was jumping in joy.
something changed that night, I've never had someone text me first, except my mom, and some close friends that I've known for a long time, but it was awkward to get a test at that time, because I was home so why would my mom text me and also all of my friends would have slept by now so who could it be, I opened my phone, I had a "Nokia Lumia" back then, and it was a text from her, Look I can't explain feelings but here's how it felt: Remember your first orgasm but like extra, I was happy, scared and absolutely astonished by the fact that she texted me... to be continued...
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